How do you feel when you have been refused? What does it feel like to be rejected? You know, being told to go back to square one? Having your ideas shunned and dismissed? Rejection is a word that many of us dislike but all of us have had some experience of it. From being refused an ice cream when we were 5 years old because we didn’t eat our vegetables, to the bank loan we so desired and were denied or a partner who didn’t want a relationship. It’s a drag, it’s a pain but everyone has a story to tell about rejection. The key is How To Handle Rejection. Better still Reject Rejection!
-Focus on redirection, not rejection – Georgia Varjas
Like many episodes in our life it is how we react, respond and deal with these experiences that reveals our character and personality. The outcome and the way we proceed and perform after rejection is the real test for us. Of course, no one enjoys being turned down or pushed aside, but it is worth looking at the bigger picture too. Maybe, just maybe something better is waiting round the corner. Perhaps, you have actually been saved from a commitment that you really didn’t want in the first place? Or it could be a great lesson to learn, just hiding under the surface. I believe that we have to find a way to reject rejection, and that includes the hurt that we take on board from being excluded or eliminated. How can we do that?
Jack Canfield in his book, The Success Principals advices us to remember the following.
SWSWSWSW = “Some will, some won’t; so what – someone’s waiting”
Some are going to say yes and some will say no. So what! Because out there somewhere, someone is waiting for you.
-The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph – Thomas Paine
In my up coming book, Breaking Rules – Changing Roles – I have a whole chapter on this topic, but coming from another angle. For me, when I face failures or rejections I turn to support from the Four Fabulous Sisters (or brothers!) Consistent, Persistent, Insistent and Resistant. Call them your gang or partners, your bunch, club or line up – they are there for you. When that roller coaster hits the low levels and you feel like giving up, feel like you want to hide, feel the pain of refusal and rejection – then it’s time to call them in. Don’t get it? Time to grit your teeth and get Persistent, get your hands back to work and be Consistent. Be totally Insistent on your goals and fight off rejection by re-directing the negative and feeling Resistant.
Remember they are not your imaginary friends, they are potent and persuasive attitudes or characteristics that you can call on any time.
Smart Decisions brings on the Self Confidence and that leads to Courage and all of these attributes are lessons to learn.
After the Book launch in July, I shall be offering again an opportunity for You to jump onboard my new Writing & Speaking Program that will include a 4 -day special event here in Spain. Plans are in progress. So connect with me if you are ready to take your writing and speaking skills to the next level on Video, Stage or Page.
Have a wonderful week and Be Consistent, Persistent, Insistent and Absolutely Resistant!
Very interesting and again a thought provoking theme.
What can we do with rejection? Refusal is a normal phenomenon in nature and we can learn from it. Either adapt or ignore it which is not always the smart move. I think it is important to analyse our possible errors and the reason why we have been rejected. If necessary we have to change our tactics, re phrase our words and check our timing. Sometimes we are blind to the details of our communication and that can lead to rejection. The passion or energy to our response to rejection depends on our seriousness and intention. Thanks again for your irresistible writings.