Do I have your attention?
I am…of course, referring to showing vulnerability!
Yes, some guys will groan but most audiences respond when you show real feelings, authentic voices and passionate stories.
Showing your vulnerability means you are a healthy human and that will make you enormously attractive to your audience. It is a powerful way to connect with your public.
There are many TED Talks, and books on this topic. Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston, she has spent the past thirteen years studying vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame. Brené’s 2010 TEDx Houston talk, The Power of Vulnerability, is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world, with over 25 million viewers.
To make mistakes is human and to have nerves is normal. The key is to discover your unique way to turn that into charismatic energy. To speak about something that hurts, makes you sad, angry or happy and then show and share that emotion to your audience is impressive.
Do you feel passionate about your topic? Show it, let your public taste, smell and feel your passion.
If your message resonates with your listeners so will your passion.
Of course, if you have to give a speech about paint drying or something that does not arouse your passion but only your bank account…well…You need to ask yourself, ‘Can I really do this convincingly?’
If you can…bravo, deliver your speech and collect the money. However, do ask your self (and your audience) ‘Did I convince anybody? Have paint sales risen?’
When you make a cake (a gourmet meal or other delicious concoction) for your family or loved ones, daughters, nieces, grandma, and you do it with pleasure, that is; buy the best ingredients, serve it with good coffee, liqueurs or dessert wine. Everyone will love it and love you. You will also feel rewarded.
You will feel the appreciation, hear it and see it as well.
Get the ingredients right. Mix them up with expertise and love, then, deliver with passion.
Eat, swallow, digest and enjoy!
Being vulnerable has been and continues to be scary for me. (There! I have said it!)
I remember one time; I gave a very personal speech at my TM club. I had nightmares beforehand, I thought that the ceiling would fall down, that they would hate me, that we would feel shame and run and hide from each other.
But they didn’t and the ceiling stayed up and no one covered their face in shame. They loved my speech, the message and my style. Afterwards, several people came and talked to me and asked questions. It was a great lesson for me to feel vulnerable and be appreciated for it.
We all have to start somewhere, so I suggest you start with a small personal story. (Breaking down and crying on stage is not part of the Speaker World, it is not Speaker Therapy!)
Part of this amazing journey of being vulnerable on stage is about our ability to empathize. There is a significant difference between empathy and sympathy and often the two are misunderstood. Empathy requires you to understand, share and get into the shoes of the person expressing their situation, their story. When you sympathize you are feeling sorry or pity for their misfortune. Two different planets.
People today are looking for stories that resonate, they want to feel included, so your task is to connect, engage and include your audience by sharing your real emotions and passions.
Scary? Yes! Rewarding? Immensely.
Be brave, show your vulnerability, people will love you.